Top Tips for 1st Chapters

I was following up on some recent comments on my "Top Tips" for writing blogs, when I realized something dire. Way back when, I promised my readers "My next blog will be tips for writing a great opening chapter..."

Well, there are several blogs after that one, and none of them are about tips of any kind. I'd lied. Although I didn't feel really, really, really guilty about my misstep, I knew I ought to fess up and put the situation right.

Except...I quickly realized that the likely reason I'd never done a post on opening chapters was because...I don't know how to write great opening chapters. How does an author, with just a short chapter's-worth of mere words, introduce a novel's characters, set the scene in time and place, begin the action, foreshadow the future, explain the past...and draw the reader into the story?

Beats me...

But it doesn't beat my fine friend and bestselling author, Cheryl Kaye Tardif. She graciously agreed to do not one, but TWO guest blogs on how to write gripping first chapters.

Thanks, Cheryl. You're a doll.


Creating a Gripping First Chapter: Part 1 - The Four Firsts

©2007 Cheryl Kaye Tardif

In fiction, suspense and foreshadowing create mood, tension and the desire to read more. You want your readers to be gradually drawn in to your story, reeled in by conflict and the need to see resolution. To accomplish this, consider The Four Firsts.

The Four Firsts: First sentence, First paragraph, First page and First chapter

First sentence: Make your first sentence count for something. Don’t start off describing the sky or field unless you can include something that will truly grip a reader.

A million stars twinkled in the sky and the moon hung full and white amidst them.

Does this sentence really grab you, make you want to know more, or tell you anything about the story? No. It’s a weak first sentence…boring.

On the night that Mary-Jane hung herself from the oak tree in her back yard, a million stars twinkled in the sky and the moon hung full and white amidst them.

How about now? Do you want to know why she hung herself? Who is Mary-Jane? Why did she hang herself outside? Maybe she didn’t. Maybe she was murdered. See how many thoughts come from that one sentence? You must toss out the bait to readers, then reel them in.

Introduce a character in the first paragraph―your main character if possible. Show us something about him or her. Give us a clue as to where this story is going. A study done a few years ago showed that most successful classic novels began with an interesting sentence containing a pronoun such as ‘he’, ‘she’ or ‘they’.

On the night that she hung herself from the oak tree in her back yard, a million stars twinkled in the sky and the moon hung full and white amidst them.

Now we REALLY want to know who she is. And we want to know why she hung herself.

A first sentence needs to grip your reader like a pit bull and not let go.

First paragraph: The first paragraph needs to reveal something, a hint of the plot. It might only be revealed in that first sentence. Introduce a challenge or conflict. Use the setting or weather to create mood, if appropriate, but stay focused on the character. You want to keep the reader there, in that moment. Be careful you don’t switch them out of the mood.

On the night that she hung herself from the oak tree in her back yard, a million stars twinkled in the sky and the moon hung full and white amidst them. The fields glistened from the evening rain. A storm had raged through and left everything soaked. The barn doors flapped in the restless wind.

While the description above is engaging, it takes the reader away from Mary-Jane. What you want to do is find a way to bring her back into the story so that the reader will want to know more. To know more, they have to keep reading.

On the night that she hung herself from the oak tree in her back yard, a million stars twinkled in the sky and the moon hung full and white amidst them. The fields glistened from the evening rain, as if Mary-Jane had wept a river of tears before slipping the rope around her neck. To the left of her limp body, the barn doors flapped in the restless wind.

Again, the reader is drawn into Mary-Jane’s life and there is a hint of torment and a visual that is vivid and emotional. You can almost see her body hanging from the tree.

If your first sentence is dialogue, make it gripping. The first paragraph rule then defaults to that line of dialogue plus the next paragraph or lines of dialogue. Make them count!

A first paragraph will draw you into the story and make you want to know more.

First page: The first page is the page that the average reader will read in a bookstore and judge your work on. Some readers will read it to determine if this is the next book they’ll read or buy, or if they’ll grab another one from the pile.

In fiction, your first page must have enough action, characterization, dialogue, humor, mystery, adventure or suspense to make the reader turn the next page. That is your goal. You will need to find your balance between narrative and dialogue and introduce a character by giving us some insight into him, her or it, or give us a glimpse of the plot―by foreshadowing or exposing the murder, love interest, humorous incident, adventure to come, etc. Give us at least one conflict―internal or external.

Remember, this is the beginning of your story. You will be introducing characters and then as the story progresses, you’ll develop these characters―their physical descriptions, voice, moods, back stories, relationships to other characters and motives (good or bad) for all their actions. Don’t do a description dump (full body/clothing description) as soon as you introduce a character. Keep your narrative short! Tell us only what we need to know at that time.

First chapter: Make the first chapter count by having enough action and dialogue to keep readers engaged. By the end of this first chapter, a reader should know a few things about the main character and possibly some things about the antagonist or a secondary character. Show us your character's flaws and weaknesses, and their strengths. We should care about your main character in some way. We should know that something is going to happen. We should sense conflict of emotion or external conflicts. Foreshadowing grabs a reader's attention. Keep in mind, the first chapter is your prologue, if you have one.

If you haven't successfully baited the trap or planted enough suspense in this first chapter, a reader is more likely to put the book down and walk away. There is a key element to preventing this. It's called a Chapter Hook, which I'll be explaining in a future post here. Happy writing!


Cheryl Kaye Tardif is a bestselling author who lives in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada. Her novels feature varying elements of suspense, from light mystery in Whale Song to her gripping techno-thriller The River to her paranormal thriller Divine Intervention. Her latest releases are Skeletons in the Closet & Other Creepy Stories and her award winning novelette Remote Control. Cheryl has also branched out into romance, under the pen name Cherish D'Angelo, and Cherish's debut romantic suspense Lancelot's Lady will be releasing on September 27th, 2010. http://www.cherylktardif.com and http://www.cherishdangelo.com

My October PopSyndicate KidLit 101 column will be a review of Cheryl's popular "Whale Song." Watch for it!http://www.popsyndicate.com/member/5042

Eileen Schuh,Canadian writer http://www.eileenschuh.com/

5 Tiny Tips

I was told that authors’ blogs, in addition to promoting their books and skills, generally provide tips to writers. However, as I have not succeeded in publishing a novel I was reluctant to offer advice. Surely, I thought, my readers would rightfully question my qualifications. Perhaps they’d be inclined to do the opposite of what I suggest, believing that doing so would give them a better chance at a successful writing career.

However, yesterday as I read the opening chapters of novel submissions on the Harper Collins Authonomy website ( http://www.authonomy.com ) it struck me that I’ve learned a fair amount in the past few months. A lot of it simple stuff, but stuff that makes a manuscript shine. Stuff that makes readers/agents/editors choose one story over the thousands out there.

I was once, not too long ago, of the opinion that if one wrote a great story, with a great plot and awesome characters, publishers would buy it and pay an editor to fix up one's writing. Needless to say, I’ve changed my mind. To catch anybody’s eye, one’s writing must shine. It must glisten.

Excellent, powerful, polished writing is more likely to garner a publishing contract than great plots and loveable characters.

Why? Pretend you are an editor with five hundred manuscript submissions on your desk. Or, imagine you’re a reader in a bookstore, thumbing through books looking for one to buy. You choose one and open it to the first page:

“I don’t believe you said that,” Eileen said, turning around and heading toward the door. She was as angry as a wet hen.

“You better believe it,” Cheryl said, rising up and stepping toward her from behind her rich, red mahogany desk.

“You do realize who you are talking to?” Eileen asked, placing her hand around the brass doorknob and turning it.

Okay. So you might be really interested in why Eileen thinks she’s special and what Cheryl said to piss her off. But the writing…is awful!

Five simple things that I’ve learned lately:
#1: use ‘ing’ words sparingly. Although there is nothing intrinsically or grammatically wrong with them, too many slow the pace of the story. I'm speaking of 'ing' words like turning (2), heading, stepping, talking, placing, rising… (Wow! Seven out of the 62 words in the above excerpt are ‘ing’ words.)

#2: watch for repetition of words (In the above four sentences, I twice used ‘turning’ and ‘around’)

#3: get rid of useless words (people can turn instead of turning around. They can rise instead of rising up)

#4: replace clichés with wonderful, powerful phrases that are uniquely yours. For 50 years your readers have been imagining angry wet hens. Today, they pick up your story wanting to experience novelty, participate in adventure, live in a world different than the one with angry hens--the one in which they’ve been living for 50 years.

#5: Within a sentence, tell your readers things in the order that they happened. Readers are using your words to create images in their minds. A good writer ensures her readers can proceed smoothly from one image to the next without having to re-create images to accommodate new information.

So, you set that book down, pick up the next one, open it to the front page and start reading. (Instead of “You start reading the front page of the next book, having set the first one down and opened the second.”)

“I don’t believe you said that!” Eileen shouted. She spun away and headed to the door. The acrid scent of anger trailed her.

Cheryl slowly rose and stepped from behind her rich, red mahogany desk. “You better believe it.”

Eileen paused, her fingers wrapped tightly around the brass knob. “You do realize to whom you’re talking?”

Same story. Same characters. Same setting. Fifty-six vs 62 words. (That would be a difference of six thousand or more words over the length of a novel) Which story would you choose to read?

I invite you to peruse the many novels on the Harper Collins Authonomy website. This site provides writers a great opportunity to study the differences between well-written manuscripts and novice attempts. Anybody can read the books posted by authors. If you register, you can also vote and leave comments.

I'd love you to read the opening chapters of my novel, FIREWALLS, on Authonomy. Let me know what you think: http://www.authonomy.com/ViewBook.aspx?bookid=18428
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"He said...She said...They said & we wept--Excuse me, ma’am, your dialogue tags are showing."

Some more tips for the novice writer coming soon!

Eileen Schuh,
Canadian writer
www.eileenschuh.com

"Brain Tales" by author Sarah Butland

“At Ease”

The archaic language...
Or perhaps, the tears.
The short, confusing journeys that take forever.
Surreal. Compelling.
One loses a child and suddenly and thereafter, the world makes no sense.
“Once the tears reached the river the reflection distorted and then reshaped…”

Must re-read this deceptively simple tale...

At Ease—A Sarah Butland Brain Tales story

_____________________

Sarah, why do you write?

Like many writers say, I write because I have to. My mind, my heart and my soul all continually tell stories and I try to do them justice by writing some down. Some turn out to be muddled useless anecdotes that I keep to myself while others need to be shared with the world. I also write because I love to.

If your time and your energy were a pie, how big a piece would be devoted to your writing?

Eight weeks ago I would have said 98% of the pie would be the piece I wanted to devote to my writing, with a sliver being the actual amount I did. Now, with a new born to look after and love I am actually writing a lot more (while he sleeps and entertains himself for a few hours each day) so I'd now say a reasonable size piece, not to make one feel bloated but just right after a healthy meal. :)

People read for many reasons (entertainment, enlightenment, education, spiritual fulfillment.) Which of humanities needs and/or desires do you see your writing fulfilling?

My writing has been primarily focused toward the entertainment aspect of reading. Very light, quick reads that have my readers wanting to read more while they relax on the beach.

What role does cyberspace play in your writing career? What does your future writing career look like?

With many of my own websites I've been given the opportunity to blog about random things, specific things, meet many fellow authors and aspiring authors as well as learn so much through marketing and writing sites.
I plan to have my writing career take off any day now and, although I plan to go back to my full time job as I love it, writing is what I do best.

Where can people find/purchase your published work? Unpublished works?

Sending You Sammy and Brain Tales Volume One, my two published works thus far, can be found on Amazon, Barnes and Noble and Chapters websites as well as local stores in Comox, British Columbia and Moncton, New Brunswick. Unpublished works can be found at www.SarahButland.com.

What advice do you have for me and other aspiring novelists?

Keep at it! Of course it's a cliche but this one is the best one out there. Do it for yourself most of all, if you're truly a writer the only audience you really need is you. Any readers who love your work after that make you quiver with delight.

Thank you for the interesting questions and for posting this, Eileen. Very much appreciated.
Sarah Butland

Thank you, Sarah, for sharing with us.
Enjoy that little one! Give him a cuddle and kiss for me....