My last Thanksgiving post was all about looking forward. We announced we had a new grandchild on the way. We didn’t know it then, but that baby would be our first granddaughter. She arrived healthy and happy as the Mothers’ Day 2012 sun rose.
Thanksgiving 2012 will be much different. Although, we eagerly anticipate the November arrival of our fourth grandchild, I’ll be doing more looking back, than looking forward. The weather is cloudy and cold. I have no turkey in my freezer, no plans to dine with family and friends. No invitations have been sent.
The summer of 2012 stole two great women from my life. Both my mother and mother-in-law passed within weeks of each other. Those empty places are still painfully empty, continually swallowing my ability to be social, to concentrate, to plan. To anticipate. To smile.
Yes, 2012 brought sorrows about which I never dreamed while sitting at that Thanksgiving table twelve months ago. However, it also fulfilled dreams—like the birth of my first granddaughter. And presented unexpected things—like a Imajin Books buying the publishing rights to both my self-published novel THETRAZ and its sequel (FATAL ERROR).
I cannot and will not say I’m not thankful this Thanksgiving, for I am. I’m very thankful for family and friends and the community that supported us throughout the sad summer. I’m thankful for the wonderfully warm September that allowed us to enjoy the outdoors, despite having lost our summer to grieving. I’m thankful that FATAL ERROR is at the proofers and will soon be on bookshelves and Kindles around the world.
No, it’s not that I’m not thankful, but more like I’m putting my joyous thoughts on hold for while—just a while…until I’m ready.
Perhaps come Monday, from somewhere a turkey will appear, roasting in the oven at the cabin. Maybe a glazed yam or two. A bouquet. Perhaps friends will gather. Perhaps…
THE TRAZ eBook only $2.99 Paperback $9.99
SCHRÖDINGER'S CAT eBook only $2.99 Paperback $7.95